Daily Geisha

Live In Truth ...

2012-03-05T06:37:00.000-08:00

"I forgive myself for negative choices of the past by living in honesty today. I now choose to live in truth." ~Denise Marek

What does it mean to live in truth?

Forgive yourself for everything that was and start living for tomorrow. Create the destiny that you truly know you’re capable of.

The power to create the best you and the best life possible for tomorrow is in this moment. You can find the strength within to use the key of forgiveness to let go of the past and move into the future with a new perspective and an abundant appreciation for this fresh start. You have the opportunity to create an outcome for your life that’s of your choosing.

Use the power of your mind to say: I’m strong. I do deserve a new start. It’s okay to be me. It’s okay to have had my experiences. I accept that this is how I’ve lived, and I’m aware of how it has affected me. I forgive myself now for living that life, and I choose to never go back to it. I will break the patterns and cycles of the past.

You can be happy with yourself. You can enjoy peace because you choose to no longer be controlled by your ego. It’s okay to be you. It’s good to love and forgive yourself for everything that was and start living for tomorrow. Create the destiny that you truly know you’re capable of.

You can become the person you want to be. You can change—if you do the work. Even if you’ve been very negative and hurtful, you can choose to transform and not be like that any longer. You can become a committed, honest, loving, compassionate individual; you never have to go back and re-create negativity in your life or the lives of others. Tell yourself:

I no longer live in that mind-set. I no longer think those thoughts. I’m no longer controlled by my ego’s presence. I forgive myself for negative choices of the past by living in honesty today. I now choose to live in truth.

What does it mean to live in truth? It means to live honestly at all levels. It’s not just about what you say; it’s about thoughts, actions, and the way you live. This involves authenticity—to live in alignment with who you know your true self to be. What you’ll receive is very empowering. You become free to live and explore the truth of who you really are as you move toward the future. You’re at liberty to change, develop, and go further in you own life within your own true spirit and mind.

By Denise Marek

Everything You Do Matters ...

2012-02-27T07:44:00.000-08:00

"Just as our acts of kindness can create good effects in the world around us and abroad, so too can our acts of negativity and unthoughtful ways"

~Danielle Miyoshi

Everything you do matters. Everything you don't do matters. Each choice, each form of action and non-action has it's effects. Whether these effects are good or bad depends on you. A simple smile can truly change someone's life. You never know what someone is going through at any given moment, or how they will react to your actions or lack thereof, and although we cannot save the world every single second of our lives, we sure can do our best not to make it any harder for others and ourselves.

It takes a conscious effort on our part to act in kindness towards others and even courage and strength to show kindness towards people who can be difficult to deal with. However, it is in our best interest to practice this kindness each and every day, hour, and moment. The more beauty we send out into the world, the more beautiful our own world becomes. The kinder we are to others, the kinder others will be to the people in their own world, and so on.

Just as our acts of kindness can create good effects in the world around us and abroad, so too can our acts of negativity and unthoughtful ways, which can be hurtful, whether intentional or non-intentional. This is why it is so important to remain conscious of our thoughts, feelings, actions and the way we handle all of them. We need to study our emotions and behavior patters and try as best we can to cultivate our best selves. We have to remember that our feelings aren't the only feelings that matter in the world. And that we are effective in this world whether good or bad, whether we like it or not. There is no avoiding this. There are only two options, and that is to be either a positive effect or a negative one.. the choice is always ours.
Continue reading >>

Live a Life that Matters ...

2012-02-16T06:35:00.000-08:00

Ready or not, some day it will come to an end. There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days. All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten will pass to someone else.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance. It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed. Your grudges, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear.

So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire. The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away. It wont matter where you came from.

It wont matter whether you were born beautiful or brilliant. Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant. So what will matter?

What will matter is not what you bought but what you built. Not what you got, but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success, but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence, but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.

What will matter is not your memories but the memories that live on in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.

It happens by choice . . .

Express Who You Really Are ...

2012-02-14T05:45:00.000-08:00

"Every desire reveals your true nature." ~ David Deida

Every day you want to do many things, from hugging your lover to earning money. Why? What feeling underlies all your hopes and dreams? This feeling is the tension between who you really are and who you assume yourself to be.

Consider your desire for intimate relationship. There are many reasons for engaging in a relationship. But you only feel utterly fulfilled in intimacy when you and your lover trust each other so much that you are willing to let down your guards, open your hearts, and love. This is your deepest desire in intimacy because, in truth, you are open as love—but you assume yourself to be a separate, isolated individual. So you scheme and dream to experience in your relationship what, in truth, you already are.

You want to enjoy financial security because, in truth, you are abundance, although you assume only effort will provide a feeling of ease. You enjoy dangerous sports because in every moment you are at the edge of death—the ultimate edge of winning or losing—and yet your assumed security makes you seek risks. You want to eat chocolate because, deep in your heart, you are blissful fullness, though you often close to its pleasure and so seek its taste.

Through your daily round, you seek to approximate the truth of who you are that you have lost touch with. This drama of approximation is the story of your life. You never quite succeed like you hope to. You never quite get the love you really want. And so you either try harder or give up trying. In either case, you are missing the point of existence.

Make This Day Yours ...

2012-02-13T08:44:00.000-08:00

I promise you nothing is as chaotic as it seems. Nothing is worth your health. Nothing is worth poisoning yourself into stress, anxiety, and fear.

Whatever you will face today, you have everything it takes to face it head on! All you need to do is believe in yourself and your abilities. Do not let today's adversities get the better of you . . . instead, challenge them and show the world and yourself that you are greater than any obstacle, because you are!

Take control of your life, your fears, emotions and let go of the illusion that you cannot conquer a thing. Become the leader of your life. Lead yourself to where you want to be. Breathe life back into your ambitions, your desires, your goals, your relationships. . .

Make this day what you want it to be, do your best and let the rest go . . .

Surrender to the Moment ...

2012-02-13T03:00:00.000-08:00

"It is this complete surrender to the Universe that connects us toLight"

It is a common spiritual law thateverything happens for a reason. It’s a tough pill to swallow sometimes.The reasons are not always clear, but the events of our lives appearbecause we deserve them and because they are designed to help us totransform and grow; and transformation brings us closer to a connectionwith the Light…which is always good!

Today, instead of meeting every seemingly negative situation withdismay, try to be mindful that there is a lesson in the circumstance andthis lesson will take you to a better place ultimately, to a higherspiritual level. In moments of distress, as difficult as it is to see thereason for our hardship, find within yourself the strength to say, “Fornow I will accept this challenge, not knowing the reason but trusting theuniverse has sent this to me for my own good and that someday I will fullyunderstand.”

It is this complete surrender to the Universe that connects us toLight.

Unfortunately, our Desire to Receive for the Self Alone constantly seeks todistract us from having this consciousness. Instead we get in our own way,with worry and fret we make mountains out of hills. We want to fix theproblem right now. We want to see the fruits of our work instantaneously.Sometimes we need to stay in the discomfort in order to reap the greatestbenefit. So rather than asking for the pain to stop, ask to see what thepain is here to help you learn. Once you learn the lesson, there is noreason for the pain, right?

The Creator always has our best interest at heart. Today, we have thepower to surrender to the moment, to choose to be patient, to look for thelesson and to allow the hidden gift to unfold before us.

Why Not You? ...

2012-02-12T06:35:00.000-08:00

“We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.”

~ Steve Maraboli

Today, many will awaken with a fresh sense of inspiration. Why not you?

Today, many will open their eyes to the beauty that surrounds them. Why not you?

Today, many will choose to leave the ghost of yesterday behind and seize the immeasurable power of today. Why not you?

Today, many will break through the barriers of the past by looking at the blessings of the present. Why not you?

Today, for many the burden of self doubt and insecurity will be lifted by the security and confidence of empowerment. Why not you?

Today, many will rise above their believed limitations and make contact with their powerful innate strength. Why not you?

Today, many will choose to live in such a manner that they will be a positive role model for their children. Why not you?

Today, many will choose to free themselves from the personal imprisonment of their bad habits. Why not you?
Continue reading >>

Rocking the Boat ...

2012-02-11T07:58:00.000-08:00

Human nature isaverse to pain and discomfort. We want everything to be smooth. But wedon’t grow from staying still. We don’t bring our dreams alive byplaying it safe. We don’t get what we want by waiting for God to deliverit to our doorstep. We must embrace difficulty and change if we are tocreate a fulfilling life for ourselves.

If a boat is not rocking, it’s not going anywhere.

We Project Our Strengths ...

2012-02-08T06:53:00.000-08:00

"Any situation that you find yourself in, is an outward reflection of your inner state of beingness."

-- El Morya

We have discussed that OUR WORLD MIRRORS WHO WE ARE BACK TO US. When we get upset by something outside of us, our reaction shows us that we have an inner wound to be healed.

Just as we can be unconscious of our wounds, we can also be unconscious of our strengths. If you are really drawn to the positive qualities in another person, you are being invited to own those same qualities in yourself.

"The people we are in relationship with are always a mirror, reflecting our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors reflecting their beliefs. So relationship is one of the most powerful tools for growth... if we look honestly at our relationships we can see so much about how we have created them."

-- Shakti Gawain

"Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature into his pictures."

-- Henry Ward Beecher

Be Reminded By Jealousy ...

2012-02-07T08:24:00.000-08:00

"Jealousy points to your false hopes of fulfillment." ~David Deida

If you think money will make you happy, then you will be jealous of wealthy people. If you think sex will fulfill you, then you will be jealous of passionate lovers. Whenever you believe that something or someone, some insight or some experience will truly make you happy, you are wrong. Only opening as you are is true happiness. You suffer jealousy when you forget this.

Jealousy is the sting of false hope. Even when you get that for which you are jealous—a beautiful girlfriend, fame, a man who truly loves you, great success—nothing essential changes. You are open or closed, various experiences come and go, everything gained is threatened by loss, and nothing is quite as fulfilling as your jealousy promises.

Many people have less than you do. They are jealous of you. If they were you, how blissful would they be right now?

Bliss is the nature of deep openness. Nothing other than openness—not money, knowledge, or relationship—truly increases or decreases your bliss. This is easy to understand. Still, you are probably jealous of certain people. You want what they have.

This feeling of jealousy is a useful sign. Feel it fully. Part of you hates them for having what you don’t. Part of you justifies that you are better off without it. Part of you feels inferior for not having it. Part of you tries to feel superior by not needing it.

This complex wad of jealousy is a sign that you aren’t relaxed as

Looking For Saftey? ...

2012-02-06T08:12:00.000-08:00

"Security is when everything is settled, when nothing can happen to you; security is the denial of life."

~ Germaine Greer

Our personality likes to be in control. It likes to know how things are and what’s going to happen. Underlying this desire for stability and predictability is a deep fear that the world is a dangerous place. The personality fears it will not survive without continually being on guard.

The truth is: we cannot control what happens in life. And under the natural law of attraction, we tend to attract to us what we focus on. EXPLORE SUBSTITUTING TRUST FOR FEAR and your world becomes a gentler, happier place.

"There are no guarantees. From the viewpoint of fear, none are strong enough. From the viewpoint of love, none are necessary."

-- Emmanuel

"One thing we can do is make the choice to view the world in a healthy way. We can choose to see the world as safe with only moments of danger rather than seeing the world as dangerous with only moments of safety."

-- Deepak Chopra

Lean Just Beyond Your Edge ...

2012-02-04T09:21:00.000-08:00

"Your fear is the sharpest definition of your self"

~David Deida

In any given moment, a man's growth is optimized if he leans just beyond his edge, his capacity, his fear. He should not be too lazy, happily stagnating in the zone of security and comfort. Nor should he push far beyond his edge, stressing himself unnecessarily, unable to metabolize his experience. He should lean just slightly beyond the edge of fear and discomfort. Constantly. In everything he does....

Once you are honest with yourself about your real edge, it is best to lean just beyond it. Very few men have the guts for this practice. Most men either settle for the easy path or self-aggrandize themselves by taking the extreme hard path. Your insecurity may cause you to doubt yourself, and so you take the easy way, not even approaching your real edge or your real gift. Alternatively, your insecurity may lead you to push, push, push, seeking to become victorious over your own sense of lack.

Both approaches avoid your actual condition in the moment, which is often fear. If you are stressfully avoiding your fear, you cannot relax into the fearless.

Your fear is the sharpest definition of your self. You should know it. You should feel

Step Into Self-Awareness ...

2012-02-01T06:43:00.000-08:00

"Getting in touch with your true self must be your first priority."

-- Tom Hopkins

Here are some different aspects of self-awareness:

- Know yourself - Explore who you are: your defences, your blocks, your talents, your aspirations, etc.

- Accept yourself - We are at war with ourselves when we resist or deny certain aspects of who we are. Acknowledge the truth of who you are right now - the positives and the negatives. Only when we own our present reality can we change.

- Control yourself - Set clear, conscious intentions and discipline yourself to meet them.

- Express yourself - Go to your heart to identify what has meaning and purpose for you. Live your truth. Identify ways you can give back to life and be in service.

We work on each of these aspects all the time. But as our lives go through cycles, we predominantly work on one of them more than the others. Which aspect are you more conscious of lately?

"Our lives improve only when we take chances ... and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves."

-- Walter Anderson

"Adventure can be an end in itself. Self-discovery is the secret ingredient that fuels daring."

-- Grace Lichtenstein

Accepting vs. Settling ...

2012-01-27T00:00:00.000-08:00

"Go after what you want. Do whatever it takes. Never settle."

~Mike Salomon

When we start reflecting and doing thought work-we realize that our thoughts are the cause of our happiness or lack thereof. What this means is that we can find a way to be happy in most situations.

When we are clear in our thinking and we feel good-we make very good decisions about our life. Accepting is not the same as settling ...

Here is the difference between settling (never do it) and accepting (always do this):

Settling: Continuing something we know is not in our best interest without doing any evaluation or thought work.

: Staying in negative emotion willingly

: Consciously giving up

: Short changing ourselves

Continue reading >>

Learn Your Body's Language ...

2012-01-26T13:59:00.000-08:00

"The body has its own way of knowing, a knowing that has little to do with logic, and much to do with truth, little to do with control, and much to do with acceptance, little to do with division and analysis, and much to do with union."

-- Marilyn Sewell

Are you aware of your body’s wisdom? Our bodies usually know us better than our minds do. If you have a decision to make, consult your body before making a final choice.

Reflect on an option before you and then pay attention to your body. Are you breathing deeply or barely at all? Are your muscles tense or relaxed? Is your energy blocked or flowing?

Your body knows what it likes and it feels good when it's happy. As your body is the source of your vitality, your motivation, your inspiration and enthusiasm and most importantly, your intuition, it's best to get that part of you on-side if you are venturing into a new activity.

"When you are saying that you are happy and you are not, there will be a disturbance in your breathing. Your breathing cannot be natural. It is impossible."

-- Osho

"Our inner guidance comes to us through our feelings and body wisdom first -- not through intellectual understanding. ...The intellect works best in service to our intuition, our inner guidance, soul, God or higher power -- whichever term we choose for the spiritual energy that animates life."

-- Christiane Northrup

Dump Your Excuses ...

2012-01-22T00:30:00.000-08:00

“ The thing that cowardice fears most is decision. ”

~Soren Kierkegaard

Sometimes, if we don't have success after repeated attempts to do something, we can lose confidence and eventually give up trying. It's called "learned helplessness" (we learn to be helpless).

Are there any areas where you, your team at work, your family... have STOPPED trying (or try, but with little commitment and effort) because prior repeated failures and/ or a perceived inability to succeed has trained you not to try?

If so, what can you start doing today to minimize any "learned helplessness" that may have set in?

Think about it ... If you need a reminder to dump your excuses, here's one:

Relationship Reflection ...

2012-01-21T00:00:00.000-08:00

Every relationship rests on three legs: accepting, supporting and challenging ...

That's really it, isn't it? You want your relationships to be grounded on accepting each other as you are. On supporting each other through the inevitable ups and downs. On challenging each other to become more, to grow, to flourish ...

Which one of these is the more difficult one for you, and how are you going to practice on improving it in the next 24 hours?

Fix Your Focus ...

2012-01-20T06:31:00.000-08:00

"What we focus on, we empower and enlarge. Good multiplies when focused upon. Negativity multiplies when focused upon. The choice is ours: Which do we want more of?"

~Julia Cameron

Negativity sucks away energy. If part of the negativity stems from your attitude or perspective, commit yourself at the beginning of each day and each activity to find something positive in yourself and in others around you. If the people around you are negative and you can't change that, either remove yourself from the situation or view it simply as one obstacle you face in pursuing your own potential. Stay focused on your own goals and make the best of the situation.

People who project negativity typically have low self-esteem. They feel badly about themselves, and their negativity is simply a reflection of those feelings. Don't be one of those people. And if you are, stop it!

Take control of your negative feelings, negative self image, insecurities and self-doubt. Don't waste another second of your life living in a limited state of mind. This is your life and you only get one! Let today be your day to change for the better and live up to your highest potential! "Every moment that passes by is another chance to turn it all around." ...

Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power ... Do not give negative feelings your power.

"Accent your positive and delete your negative."

~ Donna Karan

Always Be True to Yourself ...

2012-01-19T10:59:00.000-08:00

"This above all; to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man." ~ William Shakespeare

Be true to the light that is deep within you. Hold on to your joy for life. Keep good thoughts in your mind and good feelings in your heart. Keep love in your life , and you will find the love and light in everyone.

Be giving , forgiving , patient , and kind. Have faith in yourself. Be your own best friend , and listen to the voice that tells you to be your best self.

Be true to yourself in the paths that you choose. Follow your talents and passions ; don't take the roads others say you must follow because they are the most popular. Take the paths where your talents will thrive - the ones that will keep your spirits alive with enthusiasm and everlasting joy.

Most of all , never forget that there is no brighter light than the one within you. Keep on being true to yourself. Keep shining your light on others so they will have a reason to smile. Follow your inner light to your own personal greatness , and remember that you are admired and loved just as you are.

by Jacqueline Schiff via Positive Thoughts >>

"Learn to... be what you are, and learn to resign with a good grace all that you are not. "Henri Frederic Amiel

2012-01-17T21:38:00.000-08:00

Today, We Are Striking Against Censorship !

Join us in this historic moment: tell Congress to stop this bill now!

Daily Geisha will be offline today, because the US Senate is considering legislation that would certainly kill us forever. The legislation is called the PROTECT IP Act (PIPA), and would put us in legal jeopardy if we linked to a site anywhere online that had any links to copyright infringement.

This would unmake the Web, just as proposed in the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA). We don't want that world. If you don't want it either, visit www.AmericanCensorship.org for instructions on contacting your Senator. The Electronic Frontier Foundation has more information on this and other issues central to your freedom online. Or simply inform yourself on the information provided here and sign the petition below ... Please do not delay, as this bill is expected to pass on January 24th, 2012. (Six days from today.)

Sincerely,

Daily Geisha

The Power of Kindness ...

2012-01-17T09:44:00.000-08:00

“Don’t wait for people to be friendly. Show them how.”

"... I’ve learned we don’t need to live life in a constant state of reaction to things that seem difficult or unfair. We don’t have to be the victims of bad coming at us. Our lives don’t have to be the sum of our problems—not if we take responsibility for putting good into the world.

That starts by fostering a greater appreciation for our interdependence. We are not alone. The world is not against us, and we don’t have to be against each other. We don’t have to let our fears, insecurities and wants boil over inside us until we’re all a bunch of incompatible toxic chemicals waiting to explode the second we collide.

You can always find a negative story to tell—some situation when another person was insensitive, selfish, uncaring, unfair, or just plain wrong. You can also find an underlying struggle that doesn’t justify but might explain their behavior.

If you absolutely can’t channel that compassion and patience, you can always find at least one good thing someone did in your day.

When that stranger held the elevator open, when your coworker let you take the lead in your meeting, when your mother called just to say she loves you; they’re all reminders people are looking out for you—maybe not all of them, and maybe not all the time, but probably more than you notice.

An even better way to honor our interconnection: be someone else’s positive story. Be the kindness that reminds someone else the world is not against them. Give them an anchor of positivity to find later if their circumstances seem overwhelming.

If you’ve ever ended a stressful day with a long hug—the type that’s so needed and loving it’s near impossible not to relax and receive—you know the power of a simple gesture ... "

~Lori Deschene

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!"

This has been yet another amazing post that has totally re-aligned my perspective today. Thank you, tinybuddha :

Read the rest of the amazing post and more from Lori Deschene >>

Train Your Soul ...

2012-01-13T14:14:00.000-08:00

“Wise are they who have learned these truths: Trouble is temporary. Time is tonic. Tribulation is a test tube.”

~William Arthur Ward

Life’s tests don’t come when we’re prepared for them. They come when we’re not. How spiritual we are isn’t just about how much we smile or share – it’s also what we do when we get tested.

One thing’s for sure: our inner opponent is never going to take us on when we are ready. One way to insure we make it through those trying moments is to conduct ourselves like boxers - keep hitting even when we’re hurt, and let our natural instincts take over.

The idea is to train our soul. To make our standard action an affirmative one. Start by making your small reactions more positive, and you’ll soon hold up when the big challenges come at you...

Expect less. Hope for the best. ALWAYS be prepared!

Karma ...

2012-01-10T09:57:00.000-08:00

"Karma's only a bitch if you are."

Karma is...

Action. Reaction. Everything that you do initiates a chain of cause and effect, a twisting path of action and reaction extends infinitely out in to our future and rebounds indefinitely into our past. But this infinite chain is circular; what you send out returns.

In the East, karma gives us a guide to this principle. It comes in many forms, practiced by many religions, but at its heart is the notion that what you do, good, ill, neutral, will come back upon you.

It is not a revenge, nor a cosmic punishment; it is more like a ledger, a cosmic balance sheet. You can not do something without some effect rebounding back to you.

In the West, karma is not an explicit part of our philosophy, but it is inherent in the golden rule; do only to others what you would have them do to you.

Karma can guide you. Not by fear of punishment, but by acceptance of balance.

Life Is Simple ...

2012-01-09T08:14:00.000-08:00

"Life is not complicated. We are complicated. When we stop doing the wrong things and start doing the right things, life is simple."

So starting today…

Stop berating yourself for being a work in progress. – Start embracing it! Because being a work in progress doesn’t mean you’re not good enough today. It means you want a better tomorrow, and you wish to love yourself completely, so you can live your life fully. It means you’re determined to heal your heart, expand your mind and cultivate the gifts you know you’re meant to share. May we all be works in progress forever, and celebrate the fact that we are!

Stop doing immoral things simply because you can. – Start being honest with yourself and everyone else. Don’t cheat. Be faithful. Be kind. Do the right thing! It is a less complicated way to live. Integrity is the essence of everything successful. When you break the rules of integrity you invite serious complications into your life. Keep life simple and enjoyable by doing what you know in your heart is right.

Stop meaning what you don’t say. – Start communicating clearly. Don’t try to read other people’s minds, and don’t make other people try to read yours. Most problems, big and small, within a family, friendship, or business relationship, start with bad communication. Someone isn’t being clear.

Stop wasting time and money trying to acquire more of everything. – Start focusing on quality. High quality is worth more than any quantity, in possessions, friends and experiences. Truly ‘rich’ people need less to be happy. Live a comfortable life, not a wasteful one. Too many people buy things they don’t need with money they don’t have to impress people they don’t know. Do not spend to impress others. Do not live life trying to fool yourself into thinking wealth is measured in material objects. Manage your money wisely so your money does not manage you. Read The Millionaire Next Door.

Stop spending time with negative people. – Start spending time with nice people who are smart, driven and like-minded. Relationships should help you, not hurt you. Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be. Choose friends who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you – people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. When you free yourself of negative people, you free yourself to be YOU – and being YOU is the simplest way to live.

Stop trying to change people. – Start accepting people just the
Continue reading >>

Compassion in Action...

2012-01-06T09:49:00.000-08:00

"Love and compassion are not necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive. With them, we can make a joint effort to solve the problems of the whole of humankind." ~Dalai Lama

When we look at the vast sadness and suffering in the world, we often experience intense pain in our hearts. The suffering so often seems cruel, unnecessary, and unjustified ~ reflecting a heartless universe. The human greed and fear that are causing much of the suffering seem out of control. But when our hearts open in the midst of this, we want to help. This is the experience of compassion.

Compassion is the tender opening of our hearts to pain and suffering. When compassion arises in us, we see and acknowledge what we often push away ~ the parts of life that cause us sadness, anger or outrage. The powerful awakening of our own compassion can tune us not just to the nurturing and sustaining forces of the world, but to the oppressive and destructive ones as well.

When we open to these directly and become familiar with them, instead of avoiding them as we often do, we are more likely to hear ways to respond with love and support to relieve the suffering. When the pain is our own, we want to end it. If we can't do this by ourselves, we long for help. When it is not our cry, but someone else's, compassion allows us to feel it as our own, to feel the same longing, to hear our hearts calling us to help.

The Dalai Lama has said, "Love and compassion are not necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive. With them, we can make a joint effort to solve the problems of the whole of humankind."

Compassion is the basis of all truthful relationships: it means being present with love ~ for ourselves and for all life, including animals, fish, birds, and trees. Compassion is bringing our deepest truth into our actions, no matter how much the world seems to resist, because that is ultimately what we have to give this world and one another.

-by Ram Dass (Mar 10, 2003)

Keep Your Resolutions Alive ...

2012-01-03T07:32:00.000-08:00

"Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever."

~ Mark Twain

Mark Twain was right about the problem with the New Year's Resolutions. Most of them are forgotten or abandoned and then we are on the old trampled and familiar paths a month later. But how can we avoid that and actually make lasting changes in 2012?

Well, today I'd like to share a couple of mistakes I have made and often see other people make when it comes to keeping your New Year's resolution. And how you can avoid making those mistakes and make your resolution stick and become a permanent part of your life.

1. You don't really want it that much.

It's easy to tipsily declare your New Year's resolution for 2012 when you got a glass of champagne in your hand. But do actually want it?

Maybe you don't really want it that much. But the world around you or someone in your your life seems to want it. This doesn't mean that you can't achieve it. But it might be better to focus on what YOU really want. Both to steer your life in the direction you yourself want and to create positive internal motivation instead of external pressure you feel you should live up to.

This doesn't mean that you can't use "looking good at the beach" as one motivation to get in shape. But do it because you want to look good. Not mainly because you want other people to validate you.

How do you find out what you really want to do? By really thinking about it. By asking yourself if it is something YOU truly want. And by experimenting and just trying things out (the image you have of something in your head can be quite different from the actual experience). Get to know what you really want in your life.

When you have figured out what you really want take out a pen and piece of paper. Write down all the reasons why you want to achieve this. And then along the way, whenever your motivation starts to go down, review this piece of paper to remind yourself of why it so important do make this change in your life.

2. You confuse homeostasis with "time to give up".

One problem with sticking with your resolution is homeostasis. What that means is that any system wants to be stable. That goes for you. And for the people around you.

So after the initial enthusiasm wanes it may not feel as that much fun anymore. It's sort of enthusiasm backlash. This is the homeostasis kicking in within your mind (no matter if the goal/habit etc. is actually very positive for you). It's a resistance to change to keep the system (you) stable. If you are simply aware of this being what it is - rather than a signal to give up - you can persevere, be patient and keep going more easily.

You should also be aware that the homeostasis may appear in the people around you too. Sure, you getting shape might be great. But it might mean changes in the lives of the people around you too (perhaps new food and nights spent running instead of watching TV with the family etc.). So the people around you may react negatively in some way. Realize that it is probably the homeostasis in them, not that they are being mean. It's their brains doing what's natural to keep the system (the family, the circle of friends) stable when "scary change" intrudes.

3. You don't have a realistic plan and expectations.

It's easy to get caught up in the enthusiasm and to think that your resolution will be taken care of within a few weeks. In reality, however, things tend to take longer than we may have hoped for. Especially if you haven't done anything similar before and lack actual experience to draw understanding from.

To make a realistic plan you need to educate yourself. Not just draw up some random plan. Have a look at some well respected books - for instance by checking the Amazon rating/reviews for them - and websites on the topic you're interested in. Talk and listen to people who have actually done what you want to do.

I would also recommend focusing on making the activity the goal, not the result. If you focus on losing 20 pound and misjudge the time and effort it will take to do that then it's very easy to become disheartened and give up.

So focus on the process, focus on - for instance - working out 3 times a week instead. Make that your habit and adjust the difficulty along the way. You should still have your goal of losing those pounds in your mind and measure from time to time. But keep your main focus on just going to the gym or running track consistently, week in and week out. The pounds will come off as a side effect of that habit.

With a realistic plan where you focus on consistent action it become easier to be more patient. And also not to give up when you are faced with homeostasis or the inevitable mistakes and temporary failures along the way.

4. You're not changing your environment to suit you.

I think this is an important and sometimes overlooked point. To be able to change you may have to change parts of your daily environment to better support you when establishing your new habit.

Make it easy. The weather can be pretty bad this time of year. So it becomes very easy to rationalize to yourself that you don't have to go to the gym because of the snow or rain. So make it easier. Buy some free weights and/or an exercise bike and work out from home. This can really help you to improve your consistency.
Make it fun. You don't have to go running if you never really liked it. You can play soccer if you think that is more fun. Try different activities to find what fits you.
Remind yourself. You memory is often not that good when you are doing something new, at least for the first month. So put a reminder on the fridge to work out after supper. Put out your training clothes and running shoes so you notice them (instead of having them tucked away in the closet where you forget about them). You may even want to put up your note with all the reasons for sticking with your resolution by your bathroom mirror to get a motivational boost at the start of each day.
Remove easy availability. If you are going to eat healthier this year then one simple but effective tip is simply to remove the easy availability. So toss out all the cookies and then fill up that vacuum in your life by filling your cupboard and fridge with healthier snacks like fruit and nuts.

5. You let temporary failure or mistakes lead to giving up completely.

I failed and gave up three or four times before I could establish a habit of working out three times a week. I know other people that have failed several times before they were able to switch to a new way of eating and finally stick to it. And Edison failed several thousands of times before he got the light bulb to work as he wanted.

So you got to understand that failure is normal. And the best route is to keep going and gain understanding from your failures or mistakes. Social conditioning and homeostasis often seems to lead us to believe that if you fail you should go home and not ever try again.

But the most successful people are so successful just because they failed, learned and tried again. And again. They are successful because they view failure and mistakes as something valuable instead of something that is simply dreadful and painful.

2012 will pass no matter what you do. You will arrive at New Year's Eve this year too.

So if you fail or make some mistakes, so what? Since the time will pass no matter what you do you might as well try again. By doing that you can make 2012 your best year ever.

I hope this email will help you to make that New Year's resolution stick and to get 2012 off to a positive start,

by Henrik

________________________________________________________________

Want to learn much more about living a simpler, happier and less stressful life where you dare to follow and achieve your dreams in 2012? Then have a look at my four premium courses and guides:

The Self-Esteem Course - Stop feeling lousy about yourself and start living a life of self-happiness where you live up to your potential and dare to follow your dreams today.
Simplicity - Simplify six of the most important areas in your life with this course.
The Art of Relaxed Productivity - Double or even triple your productivity and effectiveness and at the same time minimize stress.
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________________________________________________________________

Embrace Hope ...

2011-12-30T14:11:00.000-08:00

♥

I say we make this happen. We must set this world ablaze with hope. We can. We are the fuel.

I saw this status posted on Facebook by Jennifer Wright, who in turn found this somewhere else. I take no credit for the idea…but yeah…

…we can make this happen.

Whether she wears pink or blue…or GOLD, something like this can and will make an enormous difference.

Here you can sign a petition.

Petition

Here you can Like and support pages that spread this cause!

Hope.

Beautiful and Bald Barbie! Let’s see if we can get it made

…and if you’re on Facebook, join here.

Mattel Make This

Like so many movements, it starts with one.

That one lit the match.

Love Thy Neighbor Anyway ...

2011-12-30T09:52:00.000-08:00

Disciplining yourself to do what you know is right and important, although difficult, is the high road to pride, self esteem, and personal satisfaction.

~Brian Tracy

Turn on the TV, go to a news website, or read any newspaper at this timeof year and you will be sure to find some beautiful stories of sharing,hope, and love. On both a small and a large scale, people have helped otherpeople during this holiday season. This is the time of year when we go outof our way to give and to be a part of something bigger than ourselves,which is a great energy—an energy that creates miracles.

But, it’s not enough to have thisconsciousness only once a year during the holidays. It is comfortable toshare at this time because ‘tis the season to do so. But what happensnow that the holidays have passed and we all go back to work? It is so easyto fall back into our routines: thinking about what we want, whatwe need. But if we really want to bring about an evolutionin the world, if we really want to make a difference, then we have to lookfor ways to share our energy so that we can improve the lives of others.

Most religions and philosophies in the world can agree on onetenet: Love your neighbor as yourself. Like sharing during the holidayseason, this is easy to do, especially when we like the person we aresupposed to love. But what happens when we don’t like ourneighbor, or we are jealous of our colleague, or we resent our parents? Dowe still love them as we would love ourselves? For most of us, the answerwould have to be no.

It's easy to buy a coffee for a friend,but what about a coffee for the person who pushes all our buttons? Are weable to extend human dignity to the people we don't agree with or get alongwith? This, then, is our challenge and our power: to extend tolerance tothose who are different from us—not because we are “goodpeople” or it’s the right thing to do, but because doing sobrings us closer to achieving our potential.

The golden rule implies to: "love your neighbor asyourself," but, I believe that we should not only follow this rule but even more so... “love your neighbor as yourself,when it is difficult." It is only when we love when it is difficult that weremove the layers of negativity that separate us from our highest potential of being.

Every time we do a negativeaction, hurt someone else, or find ourselves in a place of anger, we createa negative, open a space for bitterness to grow and fester. Whoare these bitter people? Bitter people feel victimized or confused orbelieve that others don’t understand them. Bitter people are peoplethat are totally involved with their ego, with their Desire to Receive forthe Self Alone.

So I challenge you to take advantage of thistime of year, for it is a time of cleansing, not of our souls but of ourhearts. We have the chance to remove any sadness and bitterness we havewithin so that we can share when it is hard to share and love when it isdifficult to love.

Remember, as long as we are alive, there isa spark in us that belongs to the Light of our Creator, whoever that may be to you. But every time wethink and act like victims, we deny that energy that was given to us by thisDivine Force that we believe in. So let us use this energy. Let us be a part of the Light inthe world, a part of the good, not the darkness and most importantly not just at this time but for the whole year to come.

"What seems like the right thing to do could also be the hardest thing you have ever done in your life. It’s always worth it. "

"Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest. "

~Brian Tracy

Let Go and Let In the New Year ...

2011-12-29T06:30:00.000-08:00

"You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space." ~Johnny Cash

Do not begin the new year by recounting to yourself or others all your losses and sorrows. Let the past GO.

Should some good friend present you with material for a lovely garment, would you insult her by throwing it aside and describing the beautiful garments you had worn out in past times?

The new year has given you the fabric for fresh start in life; why dwell upon the events which have gone, the joys, blessings and advantages of the past!

It is your mind which makes your body sick. Let the spirit assert itself and demand health and hope and happiness in this new year.

Forget the money you have lost, the mistakes you have made, the injuries you have received, the disappointments you have experienced.

Real sorrow, the sorrow which comes from the death of dear ones, or some great cross well borne, you need not forget. But think of these things as sent to enrich your nature, and to make you more human and sympathetic. You are missing them if you permit yourself instead to grow melancholy and irritable.

Do not tell me you are too old. Age is all imagination. Ignore years and they will ignore you.

Eat moderately, and bathe freely in water as cold as nature's rainfall. Exercise thoroughly and regularly.

Be alive, from crown to toe. Breathe deeply, filling every cell of the lungs for at least five minutes, morning and night, and when you draw in long, full breaths, believe you are inhaling health, wisdom and success.

Anticipate good health. If it does not come at once, consider it a mere temporary delay, and continue to expect it.

Regard any physical ailment as a passing inconvenience, no more. Never for an instant believe you are permanently ill or disabled.

The young men of France are studying alchemy, hoping to learn the secret of the transmutation of gold. If you will study your own spirit and its limitless powers, you will gain a greater secret than any alchemist ever held; a secret which shall give you whatever you desire.

Think of your body as the silver jewel box, your mind as the silver lining, your spirit as the gem. Keep the box burnished and clear of dust, but remember always that the jewel within is the precious part of it.

Think of yourself as on the threshold of unparalleled success. A whole, clear, glorious year lies before you! In a year you can regain health, fortune, restfulness, happiness!

Push on! Achieve, achieve!

By Ella Wheeler Wilcox

The Misconception of a Geisha ...

2011-12-23T11:43:00.000-08:00

"Remember, Chiyo, geisha are not courtesans. And we are not wives. We sell our skills, not our bodies. We create another secret world, a place only of beauty. The very word 'geisha' means artist and to be a geisha is to be judged as a moving work of art." ~Memoirs of a Geisha

A turn of the head; the flutter of a fan; a single, elegant rotation of a hand; the sweet scent of white plum – such are the minute details which make up the hidden world of the geisha. The geisha is a relatively new facet of Japanese culture, making its first appearance in the early 1700’s. It was thanks in part to the rise in income and sudden interest in leisure activities during the Edo Period of Japan (1600-1868), that the geisha was even birthed. Handpicked from a young age, the geisha are trained in the traditional arts of song, dance, poetry, literature, light conversation, and tea ceremonies. Though belonging to a greater group of female entertainers, musicians, and artists, geisha have held a special place in Japanese culture and society for several centuries and have even gone so far as to become an international icon for the country of the Far East.

The geisha, surprisingly, were not always women – and weren’t always called geisha. In fact, the very first geisha-like class was called the taikomochi. This group of entertainers was comprised of men whose sole purpose was to amuse guests through storytelling and hilarity in hopes of making the surrounding atmosphere merrier. It was during this time (1680’s), that parents, hoping to hire their daughter’s talents out, started sending their children off to small schools to train in dance and song. These young dancers were known as

Pay Attention ...

2011-12-22T06:06:00.000-08:00

"What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself."
~ Abraham H. Maslow

STOP AND PAY ATTENTION!

Set an intention to be more aware. Become a watcher, of yourself and what’s around you. Develop the witness, the part of you that can step back from life and impartially observe how you react and think and feel.

You can learn so much about who you are if you make yourself aware of your subconscious limitations, your character strengths, weaknesses and potentials, your life challenges, gifts, talents, and your deepest desires and aspirations. By learning who you are, you can then cultivate who you aspire to be.

"Knowing others is wisdom; knowing the self is enlightenment."
~Tao Te Ching

May You Find Comfort and Peace ...

2011-12-21T10:33:00.000-08:00

* Dedicated to all of those who have ever lost and miss a loved one this Holiday Season... For me, it is my parents who I love and miss dearly ♥

May you find comfort and peace in the memories that you hold so dearly to you. May you feel warmth from the love that you have given and received by these special souls who entered your life and have left too soon. May you feel blessed to have spent as much time with them as you have, and may you never forget the times of happiness, love, and laughter that they brought into your life. May you be humbled in their remembrance and reminded of how precious life is and easily lost. May you offer your time to those you love as much as possible now and may you make every effort to make each and every memory of being with them a happy one.

Merry Christmas to all my readers, friends, and family!

“ 'You'll get over it...' It's the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don't get over it because 'it' is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never closes. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not erased by anyone but death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no one else can fit. Why would I want them to?”

Live Life from the Inside Out...

2011-12-21T00:00:00.000-08:00

"Regardless of where you were born or what your financial position in life, the power to affect your own future lies within your own hands. Your present circumstances don't determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start."

~ Nido, in Seven Choices for Success and Significance

So today is the day to start living the life of your dreams. It all starts with the right choices, because the choices you make define the person you become.

Today, I'd like to share a brief excerpt about choosing success and significance. Enjoy!

Change For a Dollar ...

2011-12-20T05:59:00.000-08:00

"All things are perceived in the light of charity, and hence under the aspect of beauty; for beauty is simply reality seen with the eyes of love."

~Evelyn Underhill

The story seems pretty simple: an ordinary homeless guy, just like one of the many we see on the streets almost daily, is asking for change.

Only the man is not so ordinary and the change he asks for is not the kind of change you might think of.

To me this video is the best example of true charity. Charity that does not start with a thousand-dollar check written in the name of a philanthropic organization, but one that starts deep in the heart, with compassion and awareness of the needs of other people.

If you have just ten free minutes today, use them to watch this video! This is sure to touch your heart as it has mine...

Could you be the change in somebody’s life today?

For starters, how about sharing this video with as many people as you can?

"He who wishes to secure the good of others, has already secured his own."

~Confucius

Personal Interview ...

2011-12-18T00:00:00.000-08:00

"Never mind searching for who you are. Search for the person you aspire to be. " ~Robert Brault

At the cusp of a new day, week, month or year, most of us take a little time to reflect on our lives by looking back over the past and ahead into the future. We ponder the successes, failures and standout events that are slowly scripting our life’s story.

This process of self-reflection helps us maintain a conscious awareness of where we’ve been and where we intend to go. It is pertinent to the organization and preservation of our long-term goals and happiness.

There are 95 questions below that will help you with this process. Because when it comes to finding meaning in life, asking the right questions is the answer...

1. In one sentence, who are you?

2. Why do you matter?

3. What is your life motto?

4. What’s something you

Rekindled Inner Spirit ...

2011-12-17T00:01:00.000-08:00

” In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”

- Albert Schweitzer

Life is a funny thing. Its ups and downs, highs and lows tend to disorient and confuse us constantly. Usually though we find our bearings and regain equilibrium as quickly as the turbulence appears and disappears. But, there are times when too much happens too frequently. There are times when we don’t seem to be able to catch our breaths no matter how hard we try. We live in the spin cycle of life- where we’re tossed around so much for so long that our sense of balance is destroyed. We wander in a constant storm without any shelter in sight and eventually lose our senses of direction, purpose and self.

During these times of tumult and uncertainty, we can still remember how things used to be, but can’t seem to achieve stability and equilibrium anymore. With time, our minds allow us to forget what we’re missing, in order to protect us from the loss. We go on living in a perpetual state of flux, unable to catch a break or find respite from the contact volatility. We manage, we cope and we even create the appearance of a life of balance. In time, even we start to buy into the fiction that all is as it should be.

Surprisingly, we human beings are quite capable of living in such a permanent state of instability for long stretches of time. Years can go by and we disregard our innate need for steadiness and balance. Decades may pass and yet we keep drifting aimlessly, while keeping up the appearances. We can be battered and bruised to our core and yet look and act peaceful and content to the outside world.

Then something happens-

Get Uncomfortable ...

2011-12-16T00:00:00.000-08:00

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new." ~Brian Tracy

One of the biggest reasons people get stuck in an idle state, instead of taking action to change their lives for the better, is simply that the process is uncomfortable. But to create positive changes in your life you have to step outside your comfort zone, at least for a little while.

Rather than dismissing yourself as unchangeable creature of habit, you can instead direct your own change by consciously developing new habits. In fact, the more new things you try – the more you step outside your comfort zone – the more inherently creative you will become, both in the workplace and in your personal life.

Routines stagnate us. New experiences help us grow and they make life interesting. Make an effort to try something new every day this week. It can be a whole new activity or just a small experience, such as talking to a stranger. And once you get the ball rolling, many of these new experiences will open doors to life changing opportunities.

With a strategy of continuous small steps into new experiences, we are able to sidestep the biggest barrier to positive change: Fear.

"One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again."

~Abraham Maslow

"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult."

~Seneca

"We tend to be held back from our goals by the simplicity of our comfort zones...but just how comfortable are we? Wouldn't we be more content living in our dreams?"

~Michelle C. Ustaszeski

Second Chances ...

2011-12-15T07:57:00.000-08:00

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”
~Maria Robinson

We all need second chances. This isn’t a perfect world. We’re not perfect people. I’m probably on my 1000th second chance right now and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Because even though I’ve failed a lot, it means I’ve tried a lot too.

We rarely get things right the first time. Almost every major accomplishment in a person’s life starts with the decision to try again and again – to get up after every failed attempt and give it another shot.

The only difference between an opportunity and an obstacle is attitude. Getting a second chance in life is about giving yourself the opportunity to grow beyond your past failures. It’s about positively adjusting your attitude toward future possibilities. Here’s how:

1. Let go of the past.

What’s done is done. When life throws us nasty curve balls it typically doesn’t make any sense to us, and our natural emotional reaction might be to get extremely upset and scream obscenities at the top of our lungs. But how does this help our dilemma? Obviously, it doesn’t.

The smartest, and oftentimes hardest, thing we can do in these kinds of situations is to be more tempered in our reactions. To want to scream obscenities, but to be wiser and more disciplined than that. To remember that emotional rage only makes matters worse. And to remember that tragedies are rarely as bad as they seem, and even when they are, they give us an opportunity to grow stronger.

Every difficult moment in our lives is accompanied by an opportunity for personal growth and creativity. But in order to attain this growth and creativity, we must first learn to let go of the past. We must recognize that difficulties pass like everything else in life. And once they pass, all we’re left with are our unique experiences and the lessons required to make a better attempt next time.

2. Identify the lesson.

Everything is a life lesson. Everyone you meet, everything you encounter, etc. They’re all part of the learning experience we call

Fill Your Cup...

2011-12-14T05:23:00.000-08:00

"For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way. Something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life." ~Fr. Alfred D'Souza

Today... get started early! Tackle one thing that you've been struggling with... do something, anything to contribute to resolving whatever it is that you wish to resolve! There's nothing you can't over come, get through and conquer! But you can't do it by just sitting around, ignoring it and hoping it will go away... You have to face it! If not now, then you are only selling yourself short... Don't waste a single minute of your time... your 'life' on this issue. Your time and life is just too precious. As Wayne Dyer says:

"You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear. Do it! Develop an appreciation for the present moment. Seize every second of your life and savor it. Value your present moments. Using them up in any self-defeating ways means you've lost them forever."

Educate yourself on what steps you need to take and take control of the situation. Stir up the courage, stir up the confidence and GO FOR IT! This is not just one day.. This is your life in progress! Make it as productive and meaningful as possible! We all have 'something' in the back of our minds that we wish to resolve...

"We all have to start with ourselves. It is time to walk the talk. Take the journey of making very difficult decisions. Start removing things from your life that are not filling your cup and adding things that bring joy in to your life." ~Lisa Hammon

So what are you waiting for? You can do it, so get started and get it done! Fill your cup. Make today count! 'Make it' a great day!

"Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did."

~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

"Get in. Get it done. Get it done right. Get out!" ~ Fred C. Trump

Growing Light ...

2011-12-13T00:01:00.000-08:00

"You cannot let go of anything if you cannot notice that you are holding it. Admit your 'weaknesses' and watch them morph into your greatest strengths." ~Neale Donald Walsch

At some point in our lives, all of us experience the struggle of letting go. We tend to cling to old habits or resentments that make our progress forward difficult or even impossible. When we encounter impasses in our life, we summon our old stubbornness and pride and hopelessly thrash about. Fighting our defects means living from a “me” instead of “we” perspective. Old habits die slowly.

If we pause in the midst of our struggles and worries, we can give ourselves time to let a new realization sink in; we don’t have to fight anymore. We have another choice: we can surrender. Rather than manipulating situations, we can surrender control. Surrender is essentially an act of trust. When we let go, we can trust events to unfold on their own. Trust gives us a sense of acceptance, and through acceptance we find serenity.

Paradoxically, surrender is not the same as giving up. Surrender means exchanging “me” for “we”; letting go. Many of us cling to old habits and problems, even though we realize they cause more harm than good. Deep in our hearts we feel alone in the world. We should share our strengths, experiences and hopes. Listening to suggestions would be appropriate, instead of dismissing ideas that differed from ours. Gaining a sense of connection with others helps build a foundation that will sustain us in times of trouble. We are humans, with all the freedom which that brings. When we are confronted with a problem, we feel afraid; but by cultivating a positive attitude of faith and hope we can put our problems in perspective.

Times of pain are always opportunities for growth. We don’t need to solve all our problems in a day, we don’t have to solve all our problems by ourselves. All we need to do is reach upon ourselves. Patterns of being overly critical and controlling usually means we are avoiding taking a good look at ourselves. We may be ignoring a character defect. It’s easier to blame our problems on someone else. When we let go of our efforts to change other people, we take responsibility for our own growth and change. We can turn things around by realizing we are not the center of the universe. We are each separate and unique.

The pain of personal growth is part of the human experience. While going through painful periods, we can be good to ourselves and those we love...

"Be not afraid of growing slowly; be afraid only of standing still."
Chinese Proverb

by Jim

Read the full story here >>

Have a Humble Heart ...

2011-12-12T06:25:00.000-08:00

"Humility is the foundation of all other virtues hence, in the soul in which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance." ~St. Augustine

"When your heart is open and clean, you will be humble. Humility needs a good home to dwell in. When the mind is filled with negative feelings or biased ideas towards anyone, you cannot use your humility. So fill your mind with positive thoughts towards everyone you can. If you have negative thoughts towards anyone, make an attempt to remove them. Tell yourself that you don't like one particular aspect in that person and not the person himself. In this way you will help the other person also to bring about change.

Your humility makes you a learner in every situation. Where there is humility there is willingness to learn. When humility is lacking, ego comes which doesn't let you learn from all situations and people. The power of humility enables you to learn and move forward. When you face any criticism from someone, see what you can learn from it, instead of feeling bad about it. Even things that go wrong have something to teach, for the ones who are willing to learn. With your humility continue to learn..."

"Whoever loves becomes humble. Those who love have, so to speak, pawned a part of their narcissism. "

~Sigmund Freud

Love Is a Verb ...

2011-12-11T00:01:00.000-08:00

"My friend, love is a verb. Love – the feeling – is a fruit of love the verb. So love her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?”
~Steven Covey

Most of us think of love as a feeling; an emotion that washes over us when we meet that right person. At first we’re swept up with everything they do and can’t wait to see them again. All emotions are cranked up to the max and the intense brightness lights up everything. We’re happy. We’re in love.

As time slowly passes the feeling starts to fade — it’s still very bright but the madness of it all has tapered and leveled out. You aren’t always consumed by what your love is doing or thinking. You’re off that initial high.

As more time passes real world problems begin to surface. What drew you to that person is now beginning to get on your nerves: financial problems, disagreements, or annoying habits. The rose colored glasses are off and what you see before you is a real person, the fantasy you initially fell in love with is fading away and replaced with a real person.

From The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen Covey:

“My wife and I just don’t have the same feelings for each other that we used to have. I guess I just don’t love her anymore, and she doesn’t love me. What can I do?”

“The feeling isn’t there anymore?” Stephen inquired.

“That’s right,” the man affirmed “and we have three children we’re really concerned about. What do you suggest?”

“Love her,” Covey replied

“I told you, the feeling just isn’t there anymore.”

“Love her.”

“You don’t understand. The feeling of love just isn’t there.”

“Then love her. If the feeling isn’t there, that’s a good reason to love her.”

“But how do you love when you don’t love?”

“My friend, love is a verb. Love – the feeling – is a

A New Day...

2011-12-10T07:49:00.000-08:00

"Renew, Release, LET GO! Yesterdays gone. There's nothing you can do to bring it back. You can't "should've" done something... You can only do something. Renew yourself. Release that attachment. Today is a new day!" ~Steve Maraboli

A new day is a new opportunity to take advantage of the plans that you have for the rest of your life. A new day is a new beginning, a new chance to look forward to overcoming challenges and obstacles in which you know you will see on a daily basis.

A new day is a chance for you to get wiser, to gain knowledge, and to be able to use the knowledge and wisdom that you learned in the days past, so that each new day will be brighter for you. A new day is a blessing, so treat it as such. Never take a new day for granted, because we are given every new day, we aren’t able to determine when the gift of living new day after new day will be taken away from us.

No one lives forever, and ultimately one day will be our last day. Be sure to LIVE your life, and to treat each day as a new day.

A beautiful day begins with a prayer of gratitude:

May your hearts be filled with joy and gladness. Warm rays of the sun and joy. Love and kindness with peace of mind; to use your wisdom in every situation. With prayers that Fortune with blessings to all shall be given.. May you all have a beautiful and wonderful day...

"We spend our days waiting for the ideal path to appear in front of us but what we forget is that, paths are made by walking, not by waiting. So get up, get out and make it happen! "

'MAKE IT' a Great Day!

Being a Good Person...

2011-12-09T05:57:00.000-08:00

"To be kind to all, to like many and love few, to be needed and wanted by those we love, is certainly the nearest we can come to happiness." ~Mary Stuart

In the world that we live in, this day and age, being a good person is a very hard thing to do sometimes. Basic morals that were so important to our ancestors in the past don’t seem to matter much to everyone anymore.

Moral values such as dignity, loyalty, determination, kindness, and compassion are values that aren’t found in everybody anymore. As a matter of fact in some parts of the world trying to find people who value these qualities is sort of like looking for a needle in a haystack.

A simple way to ensure that you are being a good person, and more than likely being the best person that you can be is to simply treat others the way in which you want to be treated. Do things for others that you would expect or want someone to do for you, and don’t do things to others that you in turn would not appreciate if they were done to you. This simple fact is nothing new. It's not rocket science but it is often easily forgotten. Take the initiative to do the right thing first and just do the best you can...

"Do more than belong: participate. Do more than care: help. Do more than believe: practice. Do more than be fair: be kind. Do more than forgive: forget. Do more than dream: work." ~William Arthur Ward

"Be silly. Be honest. Be kind." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Problem vs. Opportunity...

2011-12-08T10:23:00.000-08:00

"In school you get the lesson and then take the test... In life you take the test and then get the lesson."

How is a problem in your life really an opportunity?

Problems invite us to go inside to recognize a bigger picture of ourselves and of life. This bigger picture brings meaning to what is unfolding.

When you feel trapped in a problem, see if you can shift your perspective. Ask yourself, "What am I being invited to learn from this situation?" The answer will always revolve around a quality or value, like gratitude, freedom, compassion, love, will, humor or acceptance. The answer will also always promote union rather than separation.

As soon as we find the meaning in our challenge, our resistance to it melts away. Often, awareness of the lesson is all that is needed to resolve the problem. If not, the awareness brings us courage and ways to work through it. Always look for the good, positive and useful in every situation...

Make it a great day!

"The period of greatest gain in knowledge and experience is the most difficult period in one’s life."
-- Dalai Lama

Actions Speak Louder...

2011-12-07T06:48:00.000-08:00

"Actions speak louder than words, but not nearly as often."

An act goes much farther than a word will ever travel. Even when someone is silent, in different situations this silence is a communicator of a message. Instead of relying on words to make a change or a difference in the world, we must instead rely on actions for the most part.

As Mariah Edgeworth quoted " There is no moment like the present. The man who will not execute his resolutions when they are fresh upon him can have no hope from them afterwards: they will be dissipated, lost, and perish in the hurry and scurry of the world, or sunk in the slough of indolence."

Be sure to remember that who you are to the world isn't what you say you are, but is instead who you act as. Choose to commit actions, instead of just talking about them. Set goals, and make plans for your life, and never hesitate to go after them.

"All growth depends upon activity. There is no development physically or intellectually without effort, and effort means work. Work is not a curse; it is the prerogative of intelligence, the only means to manhood, and the measure of civilization." ~Calvin Coolidge

"Behavior is the perpetual revealing of us. What a man does, tells us what he is." ~FD Huntington

Search Quotes >>

The Desiderata...

2011-12-06T14:51:00.000-08:00

"Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth."

The Desiderata (Latin for Desired things) is a wonderful verse by Max Ehrmann (1872-1945) and considered by many to be the ideal philosophy of life.

Ehrmann studied law and received a degree in philosophy from Harvard after which he worked as a lawyer and then in his family’s overalls manufacturing business. At the age of 41 he put it all aside and decided to be a writer. He wrote The Desiderata when he was 55 years of age.

The Desiderata ...

Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble, it's a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Strive to Thrive...

2011-12-06T00:01:00.000-08:00

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger." ~Friedrich Nietzsche

In some circumstances of difficulty it is amazing to see how some succeed greatly when arising against a challenge while others seem to get discouraged and shut down completely in the face of adversity.

Those who are able to succeed greatly in the face of stressful turmoil are those who are strong. Whether it be mental, physical, spiritual, or a good mix of all three, when someone has great strength it shows in the way that they handle themselves in different situations in their everyday lives.

Being strong is a trait that takes time and effort to achieve, but with much hard work, dedication, and determination, being strong all around is definitely something that anyone is capable of.

One main component of being strong is getting yourself to realize that periods of pain won’t last forever and that whatever situation you may be going through in your present, will only make you stronger in the future ...

"Being strong does not mean avoiding the truth. It means accepting it, learning about it, and dealing with it head on."

"It is the nature of the strong heart, that like the palm tree it strives ever upwards when it is most burdened."

~Philip Sidney

More quotes on being strong >>

Time to Move On...

2011-12-05T10:11:00.000-08:00

"I find that the best way to do things is to constantly move forward and to never doubt anything and keep moving forward, if you make a mistake say you made a mistake." ~John Frusciante

"You are right where you should be at this moment. Now it is time to move on to what is next.

Whether your life up to this point has been easy or whether it has been difficult, you are here just the same. And your destiny does not care about your past.

There are plenty of reasons why you find yourself here at this time. What matters much more, though, are the reasons you now have for moving forward.

As good as they have been, your triumphs of the past are now little more than pleasant memories. As painful as they once were, your past failures are now behind you.

Do you realize how completely free you are at this very moment? Do you understand that the main thing holding you back is your belief that something is holding you back?

Today is your opportunity to fully taste that freedom and to finally get beyond the limits you've imposed on yourself. Reach inside, touch your most compelling purpose, and bring your best possibilities to life."

by Ralph Marston

"Don't dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer."

~Denis Waitley

Its Important To Make Wise Choices

2011-12-04T00:01:00.000-08:00

"The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice that which we are for what we could become." ~Charles DuBois

For the most part you create the life you have with every choice you make. It is so important to make wise choices. Choose your choices wisely. Wise ones are your sunshine, that brings happiness to your life. Foolish ones are your shadow, that brings unhappiness and pain.

So choose your choices very carefully. Don’t make any choices you simply can’t live with.

Some choices aren’t easy. Think things through. Weigh all that's involved. Then make the best decision possible with what you have to work with, then simply let it go, and hope for the best. Trust whatever happens is for the best, because you did your best.

Sometimes you make the wrong choice. (At times, everyone does no matter how hard they try not too). Don’t worry about it; so often, making the wrong choice actually leads you to the right one. Don't focus on the choices you've made in the past, Happiness isn’t there, but in the choices of today. Happiness isn't found in never making a mistake, but in never letting a mistake keep you from happiness.

The ability to make choices gives you the freedom to choose those things that makes you happiest. Make the most of this freedom, to make the most of your life. Life is a gift, but happiness is a choice. Choose it today, choose it everyday, and no day will be without sunshine ...

By Nancye Sims Copyright @ 2011

"The first and greatest victory is to conquer yourself; to be conquered by yourself is of all things most shameful and vile. " ~Plato

Grow Yourself ...

2011-12-03T12:53:00.000-08:00

"Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully." ~ Max Eastman

Banish bad baggage, backward beliefs, boring boundaries, big blocks and belittling blame by building your beingness bridge by becoming a beautiful, bold, balanced, broadminded, boundless being.

Take a light-hearted path to higher consciousness... First get to 'know yourself' - your personality and direction in life. Then 'create a plan'. Next 'heal yourself and what holds you back. Then, and only then, can you begin to expand and 'grow yourself' into your highest potential. Are you ready to commit to changing your life for the better? As George Eliot says... “It is never too late to become what you might have been”...

"If life doesn't offer a game worth playing, then invent a new one."
-- Anthony J. D'Angelo

Create your own personal development plan today! >>

Take Responsibility ...

2011-11-28T00:01:00.000-08:00

"Everything that you are or ever hope to be is completely up to you!"

Is that scary… painful?

Yes, I know, you were born on the wrong side of the tracks, your parents abused and neglected you, the teacher gave you detention and your high school sweetheart broke your heart. Understand this—your environment and circumstances influence who you are but you are totally responsible for who you become. Undoubtedly, you can make a sound argument that your past experiences have negatively impacted your life but blaming, justifying and complaining will get you nowhere. Stop polishing these experiences and presenting them as the reason why your life isn’t working the way you would like it to work. The harsh truth is that you have not yet accepted 100% responsibility for your life.

Accepting personal responsibility is recognizing that the Calvary isn’t coming. While you may and will need the help of others to reach your goals, the onus is on you to orchestrate your own rescue. As they say, “If it’s to be, it’s up to me!”

Just imagine an athlete at the Olympics standing at the start of their event worrying about what happened in the competition two months ago, what went wrong in practice last week or what the coach said to them yesterday. They are there, at the start knowing fully well that their performance in the race is totally within their control… today… in this moment and is not dictated by some event that happened in the past.

Charles Givens reminds us that, “You have to let go of your past in order to effectively design your future.” In other words you have to accept yourself and your current circumstances, and stop wishing things were

You Are You ...

2011-11-27T12:38:00.000-08:00

"People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within." ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

You are strong. . . when you take your grief and teach it to smile.

You are brave. . . when you overcome your fear and help others to do the same.

You are happy. . . when you see a flower and are thankful for the blessing.

You are loving. . . when your own pain does not blind you to the pain of others.

You are wise. . . when you know the limits of your wisdom.

You are true. . . when you admit there are times you fool yourself.

You are alive. . . when tomorrow's hope means more to you than yesterday's mistake.

You are growing. . . when you know what you are but not what you will become

You are free. . . when you are in control of yourself and do not wish to control others.

You are honorable. . . when you find your honor is to honor others.

You are generous. . . when you can take as sweetly as you can give.

You are humble. . . when you do not know how humble you are.

You are thoughtful. . . when you see me just as I am and treat me just as you are.

You are merciful. . . when you forgive in others the faults you condemn in yourself.

You are beautiful. . . when you don't need a mirror to tell you.

You are rich. . . when you never need more than what you have.

You are you. . . when you are at peace with who you are not.

"You have within you all of the strength and wisdom you could
ever need. Never doubt that. Never fear to draw upon it."

~ Susan Santucci

To read more beautiful poems such as this one visit Positive Thoughts >>

Drop the Mask. and Be Yourself...

2011-11-22T07:16:00.000-08:00

Shared Wisdom – How to Drop Your Mask & Reconnect to Your Soul

Shared Wisdom Guest Post
Featuring Tess Marshall from The Bold Life

“Being yourself is like showing your soul to the world, being somebody else is like showing your shadow in the dark.”

We create a soul disconnection when we don’t feel comfortable in our own skin. We often pretend to be someone we’re not, in order to temporarily feel good. We easily catch ourselves seeking approval, acceptance, titles, fame or achievement.

We give up who we are and place value on external people, places and things.

We pretend everything is good when it isn’t; we pretend to be brave when we are afraid; we pretend to be happy, when we’re miserable; we pretend to be clear when we are mistaken; we pretend to love; when we fear.

When we are attached to appearances, possessions, roles or attitudes, we feel disconnected, alienated and fake.

It takes a lot of energy to play a role in order to fit in.

It takes a lot of energy to be someone you are not.

It’s a beautiful thing when we can let go, drop our masks, relax and be our authentic selves.

It’s a beautiful thing to feel confident and competent being with anyone, anywhere.

The following tips will allow you to revel in your wonderful self.

Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge.
Audre Lorde

1. Get real

What’s natural for you? Where do you feel most comfortable and with whom? What activities do you enjoy? Spend time discovering what you like about yourself and what you want for yourself.

You have the right to be different from everyone. Take off your mask and drop your armor.

Your finger print, voice print and soul print are unique. Cherish, nurture and celebrate the real “you.”

Our life is frittered away by detail…simplify, simplify.
Henry David Thoreau

2. Simplify, simplify, simplify

Keep your relationships with yourself and others uncomplicated. Delete all drama in your life. Speak your truth with simplicity and honesty. Meditate and spend time in

Pause, Reflect, Be Kind...

2011-11-20T00:01:00.000-08:00

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." ~John Fitzgerald Kennedy

"Look kindly upon all people for you cannot fathom what epic tragedy lies behind their desperate situation in life. Everyone is struggling in one way or another. You cannot measure how much love they have in their hearts." - Dr. Jeff Mullen

This is a time for pause and reflection, a time to take inventory of all your blessings in life and be truly thankful. Not because it's Thanksgiving but rather because you are moved by your heart to do so. Then find someone who is struggling with the sting of adversity and offer them what you have and take for granted everyday. Let them know they matter, show them someone cares and lend them a helping hand. Even the smallest act of kindness may give someone who has given up a reason to hope and go on. In this world of so much and so many, no one should ever feel alone. . .

"Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action." ~W.J. Cameron

"Let us remember that, as much has been given us, much will be expected from us, and that true homage comes from the heart as well as from the lips, and shows itself in deeds." ~Theodore Roosevelt

The 100/0 Principle...

2011-11-19T09:30:00.000-08:00

"When you take authentic responsibility for a relationship, more often than not the other person quickly chooses to take responsibility as well."

An excerpt from The 100/0 Principle...
by Al Ritter

What is the most effective way to create and sustain great relationships with others? It's The 100/0 Principle: You take full responsibility (the 100) for the relationship, expecting nothing (the 0) in return.

Implementing The 100/0 Principle is not natural for most of us. It takes real commitment to the relationship and a good dose of self-discipline to think, act and give 100 percent.

The 100/0 Principle applies to those people in your life where the relationships are too important to react automatically or judgmentally. Each of us must determine the relationships to which this principle should apply. For most of us, it applies to work associates, customers, suppliers, family and friends.

Step 1 - Determine what you can do to make the relationship work...then do it. Demonstrate respect and kindness to the other person, whether he/she deserves it or not.

Step 2 - Do not expect anything in return. Zero, zip, nada.

Step 3 - Do not allow anything the other person says or does (no matter how annoying) to affect you. In other words, don't take the bait.

Step 4 - Be persistent with your graciousness and kindness. Often we give up too soon, especially when others don't respond in kind. Remember to expect nothing in return.

At times (usually few), the relationship can remain challenging, even toxic, despite your 100 percent commitment and self-discipline. When this occurs, you need to avoid being the "Knower" and shift to being the "Learner." Avoid Knower statements/thoughts like "that won't work," "I'm right, you are wrong," "I know it and you don't," "I'll teach you," "that's just the way it is," "I need to tell you what I know," etc.

Instead use Learner statements/thoughts like "Let me find out what is going on and try to understand the situation," "I could be wrong," "I wonder if there is anything of value here," "I wonder if..." etc. In other words, as a Learner, be curious!

Principle Paradox

This may strike you as strange, but here's the paradox: When you take authentic responsibility for a relationship, more often than not the other person quickly chooses to take responsibility as well. Consequently, the 100/0 relationship quickly transforms into something approaching 100/100. When that occurs, true breakthroughs happen for the individuals involved, their teams, their organizations, and their families.

Want to learn more? See how The 100/0 Principle works. >>

Avoid Discouragement ...

2011-11-18T00:01:00.000-08:00

Ten Thoughts to Help You Avoid Discouragement ...

1. Look at life as a journey and enjoy the ride. Get the most out of the detours and realize they're sometimes necessary.

2. Do your best, but if what you're doing has caused you discouragement, try a different approach. Be passionate about the process, but don't be so attached to the outcome.

3. Wish the best for everyone, with no personal strings attached. Applaud someone else's win as much as you would your own.

4. Trust that there's a divine plan, that we don't always know what's best for us. A disappointment now could mean a victory later, so don't be disappointed. There is usually a reason.

5. Ask no more of yourself than the best that you can do, and be satisfied with that. Be compassionate towards yourself as well as others. Know your calling, your gift, and do it well.

6. Don't worry about something after it's done; it's out of your hands then, too late, over! Learn the lesson and move on.

7. Have the attitude that no one, except you, owes you anything. Give without expecting a thank-you in return. But when someone does something for you, be appreciative of even the smallest gesture.

8. Choose your thoughts or your thoughts will choose you; they will free you or keep you bound. Educate your spirit and give it authority over your feelings.

9. Judge no one, and disappointment and forgiveness won't be an issue. No one can let you down if you're not leaning on them. People can't hurt you unless you allow them to.

10. Love anyway. . . for no reason. . . and give. . . just because.

By Donna Fargo | Positive Thoughts

Seek Your Own Approval...

2011-11-17T08:54:00.000-08:00

"Be more concerned with your character than your reputation."- John Wooden

Do you find yourself being worried about what other people think about you? Or overly concerned about what others say about you? While it is natural for each of us to seek the approval of others, those who are self-confident and have a high self-esteem are able to discount the negative opinions of others and to remain assured of their own self worth.

To become less concerned with what people might be thinking, and less upset by negative things others may say...

Never guess what others might be thinking.
Value Yourself
Live your own life
Make your own choices.
Value your own opinions.
Choose to associate mostly with positive people who support you.

Never guess what others might be thinking.

Don't make assumptions.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Don't Take Anything Personally. Nothing others do is because of you.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
- Robert J. Hanlon

You cause yourself much unnecessary suffering when you waste your time and energy imagining that others may intend you harm. You truly have no idea what anyone else is thinking. Train yourself to avoid making any assumptions about what others may be thinking - and train yourself to avoid making any assumptions about why other people choose to do or to say something - or to not do or to not say

Forgive Yourself...

2011-11-16T00:01:00.000-08:00

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. " ~Mahatma Gandhi

“I don't know if I continue, even today, always liking myself. But what I learned to do many years ago was to forgive myself. It is very important for every human being to forgive herself or himself because if you live, you will make mistakes- it is inevitable.

But once you do and you see the mistake, then you forgive yourself and say, 'well, if I'd known better I'd have done better,' that's all. ...So you say to people who you think you may have injured, 'I'm sorry,' and then you say to yourself, 'I'm sorry.' If we all hold on to the mistake, we can't see our own glory in the mirror because we have the mistake between our faces and the mirror; we can't see what we're capable of being.

You can ask forgiveness of others, but in the end the real forgiveness is in one's own self. I think that young men and women are so caught by the way they see themselves. Now mind you. When a larger society sees them as unattractive, as threats, as too black or too white or too poor or too fat or too thin or too sexual or too asexual, that's rough. But you can overcome that.

The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself. If we don't have that we never grow, we never learn, and sure as hell we should never teach.” ~ Maya Angelou ♥

Just remember... that when you do something wrong, even when you fail, even when you make poor choices, it doesn't make you a bad person or a failure. No doubt you will punish yourself enough for your mistakes. The question is: Will you try to do the right thing next time? Will you learn from your mistakes? Will you keep on loving and caring to the best of your ability? We will ALL make mistakes. Learn from them. Make things right. Forgive yourself and then move on. Life is simply too short to waste it any other way but happy!

"Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes
and move on." ~E. H. Chapin

A Bit of Inspiration...

2011-11-15T06:35:00.000-08:00

"If you don't have love for yourself, it's impossible to give love to others. You can't give away what you don't have." ~Joyce Meyer

Have you ever read a great quote and thought, “Why didn’t I think of that? It is so simple!”

This is the power of brilliantly said self-help quotes – they pass through your mind and find immediate response in your heart.

It does not matter if you read them when you are 10 or 87, they will still remind and inspire you to be kinder, to dream bolder, to work harder, to forgive faster, and to love deeper without expecting anything in return.

I noticed long ago that whenever I start my day with a positive and inspiring quote it is much easier for me to stay focused on the things I prize the most and to be more patient with myself and those around me.

Today I thought maybe you too are in need of some motivation and positive energy. If this is the case, I want to share with you some carefully selected Self Help Quotes that are very dear to my heart. I hope that they will inspire you to continue improving yourself (because that is what all great quotes are supposed to do).

1. “The best way to predict the future is to create it.”
Peter F. Drucker

2. “Believe in Yourself and there will come a day when others will have no choice but to believe with you.”
Cynthia Kersey

The Blind Girl...

2011-11-14T13:58:00.000-08:00

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind.                 
  She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her.  
   She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see the world, I will marry you.'    
                                                                                 
 One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages came off, she 
              was able to see everything, including her boyfriend.               
                                                                                 
        He asked her,'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?'        
  The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The sight of his   
 closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected that. The thought of looking at 
            them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him.            
                                                                                 
   Her boyfriend left her in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying:    
  'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours, they were   
                                     mine.'                                      
                                                                                 
        This is how the human brain often works when our

Respecting Boundaries...

2011-11-12T00:01:00.000-08:00

"You set your loved ones free when you try to understand them."

Human relationships seem contradictory because two paradoxical, true things happen. First, every person wants connection, closeness, and intimacy. Second, every person wants to be free and autonomous. These two needs are apparently in conflict. The closer someone gets to us, the less free we sometimes feel.

Which will we choose if we have to choose: connection or freedom? People almost always pick freedom. The Bible indicates that freedom is a gift from the Lord and without it, one would not be able to feel delight—to be happy. Love and freedom are closely intertwined.

A functional relationship must strike a balance between intimacy and freedom. When a problem arises in a relationship, no matter what the area of conflict is, the real issue is often power. Who is in charge, you or me? Boundaries are on the line.

There are two categories of boundaries in a relationship,

You can always turn it around...

2011-11-11T09:01:00.000-08:00

''Every moment that passes by is another chance to turn it all around.''

You are the light of the world.

Follow your inner star to sparkle and always strive to shine in your own special and unique way.

Always remember that no matter what happens in your life, whether it be by someone, something that happened, or even your own wrong doing that you have a beautiful soul, and of course, an outer body and a personality, which can over come anything... anything at all!

But your soul is your center.

Your soul is the part of you that is eternal, and it cannot be hurt nor destroyed so long as you take action to love, take care of, and preserve it.

You deserve happiness. Don't ever let anyone or anything get in the way of that or make you feel or believe any different!

Affirm today that your life can only be enriched by whatever your life experiences are. Utilize your feelings as guidance, not to become discouraged but instead to learn, grow and decide where to go next from where ever it is that you are in life at the moment.

I believe that laughing, loving, sharing and showing kindness are all natural, normal spontaneous expressions that feed the soul.

So, don’t worry, smile in the face of adversity,let the small stuff roll off your back, and never ever give up your right to be happy.

"There are two primary choices in life; to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them." - Denis Waitley

Have a Grateful Attitude...

2011-11-06T09:21:00.000-08:00

Benefits of having a grateful attitude...

by Benefits of Positive Thinking

You cannot welcome more abundance into your life until you have said to the universe truly, "Hey, thanks for all I have".

Find out more about the importance of being grateful and why giving gratitude completes the circle of receiving.

You can also place yourself in a better mood by being thankful.

You will find you are in a much more optimistic state after you've spent a few minutes reflecting about your blessings and feeling grateful for them. Compassion and kindness will probably fill your heart.

Besides, being grateful is a wonderful tool to attract what we want into our lives: Mike Dooley gives all the keys to create the life of our dreams in "Infinite Possibilities".

What are YOU most thankful for?

Let the world know and rave about what makes your heart sing using the form below! You can also read what other visitors of the site have shared at the bottom of the page.

The obstacle

The problem is that when things are given to us over and over, we start taking them for granted or we forget being appreciative of what we receive.

You can overcome this tendency by dedicating some time daily just to be thankful maintaining an attitude of gratitude.

How?

Simply sit somewhere where you are not disturbed. Think of anything you have (examples below).

It is not a matter of comparison, but think for a second about the millions of people who are not blessed with what you have, or are simply in a worse condition than you.

Realize that you could easily not have had all the things you do have.

Say "thanks" internally. Some people like saying "thanks" loudly.

You can use these thankful phrases to express what you are grateful for, or find inspiration in these thankful quotes.

You can start a gratitude journal in which to record what you are thankful for, or you could also use a gratitude rock.

Through gratitude you can also make an investment in positive energy which won't cost you a cent.

Examples of what you can be thankful for:

Worth While...

2011-11-05T03:14:00.000-07:00

It is easy enough to be pleasant
When life flows by like a song,
But the man worth while is the one who will smile when everything goes dead wrong.

For the test of the heart is trouble,
And it always comes with the years,
And the smile that is worth the praises of earth
Is the smile that shines through tears.

It is easy enough to be prudent
When nothing tempts you to stray,
When without or within no voice of sin
Is luring your soul away;
But it's only a negative virtue
Until it is tried by fire,
And the life that is worth the honor on earth
Is the one that resists desire.

By the cynic, the sad, the fallen,
Who had no strength for the strife,
The world's highway is cumbered to-day -
They make up the sum of life;
But the virtue that conquers passion,
And the sorrow that hides in a smile -
It is these that are worth the homage on earth,
For we find them but once in a while.

by Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Life is a Theater...

2011-11-04T00:01:00.000-07:00

Invite Your Audience Carefully...

Not everyone is healthy enough to have a front row seat in our lives.

There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a DISTANCE.

It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of, or at least minimize your time with, draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships/friendships.

Observe the relationships around you. Pay attention...

Which ones lift and which ones lean?

Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?

Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?

When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?

Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know or appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of Your Life.

"If you cannot change the people around you, CHANGE the people you are around."

Remember that the people we spend time with will have an impact on both our lives and our income. And so we must be careful to choose the people we spend the most time with, as well as the information with which we feed our minds.

We should not share our dreams with negative people, Nor feed our dreams with negative thoughts.

It's your choice and your life..... It's up to you who and what you let in it...

by The Internal Light

Be Aware of the Habitual Apology...

2011-11-03T07:36:00.000-07:00

Apologizing is important when we have done something that hurts someone else or is a mistake. We all should take responsibility for our actions and sometimes that includes an apology. The problem comes in when someone consistently does something wrong and believes that an apology will make it all better.

I have had people in my life who continually hurt my feelings, overlooked requests that I made, or ignored my personal boundaries. When I would bring this up to them, they would apologize and tell me how sorry they were. And then they would do it again. Some people think apologies give them permission to do whatever they want. If they get in trouble, they will simply apologize.

Apologies are not licenses to step over people and do whatever we please. If someone is not aware that what he is doing is inappropriate, he needs to be told. The second time he needs a warning and the third time he is out. As the saying goes, “Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. Fool me three times and something is very wrong.”

People should apologize for harm they cause. The first time we can understand. The second time we need to give them a warning and let them know what will happen if it ever happens again and the third time they are out. If someone cannot learn what is acceptable, then there is something much deeper going on.

If the person who is causing the infraction is a boss or is someone else not easily dismissed in your life, then you might need to seek support in dealing with this person. No one has the right to yell at you, physically harm you, or demean you in anyway. If this is happening to you, you need to seek an in house grievance procedure or seek the appropriate legal guidance.

How many times do you accept an apology?

“The only correct actions are those that demand no explanation and no apology.” ~Red Auerbach

Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD provides daily motivation, information and inspiration to thousands

of people through her award winning e-zine 365 Days of Coaching. For a free report, "The Power of Daily Action - How to create more Wealth, Health and Happiness by Tapping Into the Power of Daily Action" go to http://www.365daysofcoaching.com/daily_action.htm
© Coach Rachelle Disbennett Lee, PhD, 2007

Defeat Your Fear...

2011-11-02T14:26:00.000-07:00

Much of our suffering in life stems from thoughts of not having enough and not being enough.

These thoughts stir up all kinds of fears that grip us with such force we can’t even see the distortion they cause. We fail to see our greatness. We focus on what’s missing. We conform and we hide who we really are, hoping that others will accept, value and love us.

The good news is that we can reduce our internal fears through the simple act of appreciation. Appreciation stops the brain from streaming those self-destructive messages that drain your energy.It’s a neurological fact. The brain cannot be in a state of appreciation and fear at the same time. This means that when we choose to live with appreciation we naturally reduce fear and increase resilience.

Remember that fear only runs as deep as the mind allows it to!

Never Settle...

2011-11-01T06:46:00.000-07:00

"Go after what you want. Do whatever it takes. Never settle." ~ Michael Salomon

Settling is about not embracing what is best for you and accepting what you really don't want. When you settle, you accept less than you deserve. Settling becomes a habit and a way of life, but it doesn't have to be. According to Maureen Dowd, "The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for"

People settle every day in every way. They settle for unsatisfying jobs, boring lives, and stale relationships. People settle in part because they don't realize they can have better or even that they deserve better. People also settle because of fear. Fear holds us back from embracing what we really want. According to Bo Bennett, "Every day, people settle for less than they deserve. They are only partially living or at best living a partial life. Every human being has the potential for greatness."

The only way to truly embrace your greatness is to stop settling. You have to stop settling for a job that isn't challenging, a life that isn't fulfilling, and relationships that are uninspiring. Life is way too short to settle.

How do you break the cycle of settling? Start small, start slow and start now. Begin with the small decisions you make and work your way up. Settling has become a habit and a way of life; so don't expect to change the habit immediately. Begin by having only the objects in your life that you love. Don't buy things just because they are on sale. Purchase only items that you love for your home and for yourself. I changed washing detergents because I thought I found a better deal, but when my clothes became dingy, I knew I had settled for a cheaper brand, not a better deal. I immediately switched back to my favorite. Those are the kinds of things you want to begin with.

Notice where you settle for less, and where your life is looking dingy.

"The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for"

Rachelle Disbennett-Lee, PhD provides daily motivation, information and inspiration to thousands

Sad but True...

2011-10-31T08:42:00.000-07:00

"We have bigger houses but smaller families;
more conveniences, but less time;
We have more degrees, but less sense;
more knowledge, but less judgment;
more experts, but more problems;
more medicines, but less healthiness;
We’ve been all the way to the moon and back,
but have trouble crossing the street to meet
the new neighbor.

We’ve built more computers to hold more
information to produce more copies than ever,
but have less communications;
We have become long on quantity,
but short on quality.

These times are times of fast foods;
but slow digestion;
Tall man but short character;
Steep profits but shallow relationships.
It is time when there is much in the window,
but nothing in the room.”

~ Dalai Lama

Don't Mistake Kindness for Weakness...

2011-10-30T08:03:00.000-07:00

"Three things in human life are important: The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind." ~Henry James

Some people mistake kindness for weakness. Contrary to this belief kind people are not weak people. It takes strength and an awareness of personal power to be kind to people. Being kind comes from the ability to see the good in each person and to be comfortable with oneself. Treating someone with kindness, when they have not earned it or deserve it, takes special inner fortitude and grace.

It is easy to be rude and treat people with disrespect. People who habitually are rude and disrespectful lack self-discipline, are weak and insecure and need to bring other people down to feel good about themselves. A person who has healthy self esteem and a strong sense of self worth does not need to demean others to feel good about themselves. In fact, they understand that by building others up they also are elevated.

People who are rude and belligerent to others are afraid of people who are equal or perhaps superior in some way. People who understand the strength of kindness understand that all people deserve to be treated with respect and are willing to learn from others. The kind person's self worth is not jeopardized or threatened by others.

People who fear the loss of power and control lash out at those around them. People who are secure with themselves and have strong self esteem understand that no one can diminish them. Building others up is a great way to create positive energy for all.

Being rude is easy. It does not take any effort and is a sign of weakness and insecurity. Kindness shows great self-discipline and strong self esteem. Being kind is not always easy and takes effort and concentration. Kindness is a sign of a person who has done a lot of personal work and has come to a great self-understanding and wisdom. Kindness is a sign of strength.

Where can you show kindness today?

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Plato

"Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness." ~Seneca

You Will Have New Dreams...

2011-10-29T09:06:00.000-07:00

Sometimes things don’t work out,

This doesn’t mean nothing will.

One thing isn’t everything,

Now isn’t forever –

Even though it may feel like it.

Give yourself time

To see things clearly.

What we feel

Isn’t always true.

In time the disappointment will pass,

Your feelings will change,

Your life will be different,

You will have new dreams.

No matter how hard we try

We can’t hold onto today.

It will pass.

So we must hold its joys

And its

Promise Yourself...

2011-10-27T15:07:00.000-07:00

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to everyone you meet.

To make everyone you know feel that there is something good in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble in your mind.

by Christy Larson

Random Acts of Kindness...

2011-10-25T13:31:00.000-07:00

“Never get tired of doing little things for others. Sometimes, those little things occupy the biggest part of their hearts.”

Random acts of kindness are a means by which we make a deliberate attempt to brighten or help another person or stranger’s day by doing something thoughtful, caring and concerned for them.

Those selfless Random acts of kindness are a wonderful way to reach across time and space to touch the life of another being. The power behind such act is extremely impactful and contagious.

It’s something you could do for a complete stranger, but you could also extend it to your family, friends, lover, colleague, community. Integrating it during your stressful daily life is the big ideal, but again you don’t have to really force it: you could simply be kind, be thoughtful, give compliments generously, say thank you for someone who quietly makes a difference in your community, cheer up the lonely, volunteer, share a little of your wealth around, send nice messages, forgive somebody, share a smile and ideally expect nothing.

Let’s all practice Random Act of Kindness as of this year, as of today. It’s a great way to help heal humanity. We should really start doing it ourselves as part of our daily life and not rely on others anymore to make the world a better place.

“The world could be a much better place through your kindness. All because of that single act of kindness by a stranger.”

“Appreciation can make a day – even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.” ~Margaret Cousins

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~ Leo Buscaglia

So... What will You Plan to Do To Celebrate Random Acts of Kindness??